tomorrow there will be another number

so the folk fest weekend is almost over. saturday was a day of exhaustion. we ate organic sausage, sold a bit of wares, enjoyed chad vangaalen (again), spent wonderful moments with friends (the kinds of moments you wish would last forever because people dont live here and others are leaving......) i plan on spending the entire day with my man. we're going to have wonderful friends over for brunch and then we're going to read. i have a big stack of new yorkers to get through. maybe a bit of tidying will ensue. enjoy the pictures. i sure do!


the arbitrarys get ready to open for corb lund.


the arbitrarys


aaah, brotherly love


chad vangaalen


pg craft collectivizes at the folk fest.


jeremy stewart reads with the versus project..

can you see the future in all of its decay

so, it's the weekend of little sleep. and i've barely slept. i should really be in the shower right now as i'm quite behind, BUT i'm giving this a go. last night meow hosted an invite only chad vangaalen show. it was so nice and wicked and just rad. (haha, can you tell i'm tired). so many songs made me just want to cry. and then dance. it made me miss those close to me. it was also a night where i had to fight off annoying sweaty people who just wanted to touch me (yuck). i was not necessarily impressed. it got to the point where i felt SERIOUSLY infringed on and kept repeating, "don't touch me", but to no avail, fuckers. okay, i need to shower and get to the farmer's market and fest.

xoxo diandra.

you're just a faggy girl and i want a love with soul power!

i'm reading book seven. you know the one with those wizard kids? yeah, and listening to the new tegan and sarah. this week is busy, but i'm honestly feeling SO relaxed. a friend from vancouger is coming to visit this weekend. i'm going to drink tangerine tea and read more re: wizards saving the world from dark magic!

okay, i'm tired. can you believe it's almost 11:30pm?! i am so behind but so not freaking out, well, not really...it has been cold lately. which is strange (here i go, talking about the weather)..BUT i woke up with a shiver and needed more blankets and a toque to keep cool. i made stationary sets. i work EVERYDAY this week (maybe minus sunday) and i'm getting an itch to leave the country. i really miss things about japan that i know i can't have here (ie. good pub food nihon style and purikura!) my mind goes a mile a minute sometimes and others it's just...tired. our house still needs so much work. and i wish i had more time to tidy it and put it together. the worst part is that i feel that by the time i get it all cozy and reflecting those parts of me i love and becomes this wonderfuler home where we're all happy and cheery and reading miranda july short stories at bedtime (!!) we'll be moving again. i am tired of uprooting and moving! i guess it's one of those things about my/our generation (genderation?). i want to support stewart in whatever he wants to do next (montreal montreal montreal!!) but am just exhausted from starting over. it's stressful. but not as stressful as losing your family to he who shall not be named! ah hahahahahahaha! oivey.

when you're holding me....we look like a pair of parentheses

i still have that song by the blow in my head: "()". i just got off the bus from doing my show
and ventured into the cool, yet muggy and wet, air/space that is a two block walk from my home. getting here the lights were off, door unlocked. stewart's in bed and the house smells like hamburgers (yum!). i'm reading a book by theodore roszak and it's literally a work of art. i'm so happy i found it. i wanted to quote from it right now but i think i left it on the other side of the house. the smell of hamburgers is making me hungry. i might have lettuce with tuna on it. and maybe cheese (though last week i swore i'd give up cheese). i got these shoes today from my fat swap via craftster. and a bunch of fat porn. i love it. xoxo.

I got sunshine in a bag

tonight we went to a show. i'm so hot and tired (it's gross outside!!) i think we're going to cut hair and go to bed. i'm adding more things to my roster. i'm going to be a poster designer for the local healthy air group and i might be starting a band!!! woot! (this is the transmogrifiers above).

i am the girl you know so sick i cannot try...

on the weekend we went and saw the new transformers. it was one of those days where i actaully got to spend time with stewart, which i appreciated. i was and continue to be shocked by how much i liked the movie. all of it's grossness aside, i actually enjoyed it. which says alot about how relaxed i was at that time, how much i needed to enjoy my time there, and really, how tired and worn out i am and so easily swayed. i guess that afternoon i wasn't into fighting. while watching it, though, i had an awesome idea for a paper. i was thinking about writing a paper about the role of eighties popular culutre in the lives of people my age and the role of the cybernetic meadow. what happens though, when this culture that we look up to is co-opted by an american idea and war machine and sold back to us as something we digest because we're nostalgic, but also ruins our current, personal politics. i think it could and would be interesting.

i'm at school again and think i might run across campus and buy junk food. i'm exhausted. pooped really. i'm not sure why. i am also gaining weight and not sure why. hmpf. xo.

he's got a dirty mind, just don't know what you're going to find!

i'm on campus, in my new office!! i think i'm supposed to share with a few other people, who aren't around. so wolf parade, the gossip, mirah, pinback is blasting loud. no one moved in yet means that my comics make it on door and my wincing the night away poster makes it. i get to pick my shelves, my desk, and just have some alone time. and you know what? i'm actually writing! so, i thought i'd share my progress. it's nice to know that i'm about 40% done my 1st draft. and i'm only in month 7 of my program (out of 24). wut wut! tuck tuck tuck tuck tuck ya ice! what you're going to read below is the first two pages of my thesis proposal (which is also my first chapter. this is the lead in. you know, to get them hooked!) lets cuddle soon.


madness as mentorphor: where i enter and why this isn’t your same old thesis.


Convention would state that a thesis oriented Master’s program is of import. To have an attempt at legitimacy or to grasp at a want of agency and idea ownership is imperitive for one to take an academic stand. And then to get up and say, ‘this is what I believe and stand behind, now let me prove to you why,” is lauded as a move of great strength. A strength that is rewarded with the sought after “clear pass”. All of a sudden crowds of academics, with years of hard work behind them to earn their much dreamed of tenure position, jump to their feet. And what a feat! Yet another academic is crowned into the old boys club of traditional knowledge.


A number of years ago I was, like any teenager, bored of my isolated, yet supposedly “urban”, northern rural town. I would year for the big city, the cosmopolitan, the hip, the cutting edge: things not found in sleepy, “the mall is closed on Sunday”, Terrace, British Columbia. An then, one thing led to another and my interest in MuchMusic, combined with poverty, and a desire to do something, anything, led me to starting a riot grrrl ‘zine with another angst-ridden cohort. Throughout Junior High, and my zine career, I learned about the non-glamourous side of resisting the community I grew up in, such as having my zine banned from the school grounds, friendships that fell apart if you were not “alternative” or “hardcore” enough (oh the difficult life of a subculture refugee), and the recognition that, perhaps resisting and being alternative were just the same as mainstreaming yourself.
On the flip side, I was honoured with the strengths and priviledges that accompany speaking out. This included having my grade 9 English teacher, who later would come to exemplify the Beat Generation for me, read from my zine to our entire class, and discuss its importance and clutural relevance: a moment that ensured I would forever be proud of my work. My work with the Underground Lemon put me in touch with community subculture activists, counter culture maneuvers, and a positive and rousing slew of feminists.
Since those days, and over the past 10 years, I have utilized that intial connection with feminism as my foundation for the work I would complete over the ensuing time span. From speaking out against School District policies regarding racisim when I was 16, to being a 117 year old self startging fashion designer and entrepreneur, to being 21 and coordinating the Simon Fraser University’s Women’s Centre, to being 24 and a Stopping the Violence Counsellor, I have somehow led my life with an ingrained sense of feminist purpose.
Having chosen to plunk my counter culture, subculture, arty, d.i.y, riot grrrl, compassionate, electropunk, glittery, activist, hipster, feminist self into an academic setting I began to feel a bit like the crew La Vie Boheme crew:1 dancing on tables, wearing layers, partying, and resisting “the man”. And what a sense it was to be nurtured by others to do this! To be empowered to throw, “no means NO!” at the old boys club of academia, and really, do something unofficially different.2

i dont know who we are....

so we craft and we faired and it lamed. but i got a bunch of new supplies from a woman who went into a retiring home! how strange! and it was so hot out i got the most funny pinky red sunburn and just drank a good helping of double bounty hunters. (kaluha, lime, blue sky ginger) and a lot of japanese food (i made chicken karage and it was so yum!) i've had someone threaten to steal my kitties (due to cuteness) and received the most beautiful blue purculator from g.dazz. who is my new love! he rocks.

off to cuddle puddle. with ye ol' love of my life. we decided yesterday that we were going to ONLY play sunny day realestate at our wedding ceremony. which is just so perfect and oh man, yes! tomorrow: transformers!! woot woot!!

xoxo diandra.

i'm getting these.

about 22 of them in fact. exciting! Sysiphe rocks!!

forget forgotten i am moving past this...

i am so exhausted. i have finally reached a new level of stress. it's not as bad as I was, say, back in february or january, but heading towards that. i think i'm going to load some of those meditations back onto my ipod. and try to do them. and then just try to relax! a hot tub should be called for as should trying to sleep as much as possible. i climbed into bed at 1130pm last night and then awoke at 430am because it was so light. closed the curtain, fed those cats who were just digging for food, and tried to sleep. unfortunately a bad bryan adam's ballad from the mid 1990s was in my head. something about "number 9". stewart awoke and i whined, "i have a bryan adam's ballad in my head!!" after he went to work i slept with weird dreams but pretty much straight until 830am. it sucks because when i woke up at 430 i immediately thought, "i'm too stressed out". so, at least i'm somewhat on top of it!?

on the other hand i've been crafting a lot. i made an octopus bag and earrings (which are available via ohsweetie store!) and am working on some embroidery on a cowboy shirt-->robot styles! yay! i hope to finish it today! i'm loving the crafting thing. hahah. of course!

xoxo.

Task #17 In progress; Task # 37 in progress

we have watched the first 2 discs of season 4. i'm more sucked in than ever. AND, i've purchased and begun to read "no one belongs here more than you by Miranda July. so far, i love it. i love the imagery (swimming lessons in the kitchen) and the brutal sexuality throughout most of the stories. its refreshing. july is an original riot grrrl, but definitely of a different form. if you havent seen me and you and everyone we know, get on it. ive seen it SO many times and still cannot deconstruct all of the layers.