here's a picture of the tattoo i got whilst at rollercon. so something happened while at rollercon that i was not expecting. especially because i went to teach my classes, be part of RC, and to have fun. and i did all of those things. but what also happened was that i was surrounded by 5000 of my tribe (i hate that word) and being around derby summer camp and casual conversations with incredibly inspiring, strong, and beautiful people (men and women) and seeing roller derby at it's best (while still fun) reminded me why i'm doing this and why i want to keep going and where i want to go with it. i didn't realize i was having such a subconscious crisis with roller derby (it's been up and down, that's for sure) but i also remember(ed) that it's something i have to do for myself (since i've previously only done derby for other people) and if i want to climb that derby ladder and PLAY FOR A WFTDA TRAVEL TEAM OR TEAM CANADA i have to do things to get there. i haven't made any commitments or plans (formally), but have started working out more and watching my health better (i even bought more protein powder!) I've started skating with two other leagues and am looking at 3-4 on skates practices a week for August and will settle into 2-3 in September. Working out most every other day. it feels good. looking forward to it sticking.

so, then, what happens if in a year i get lots of skate time and i'm ready to try and get on a house team in a bigger league? it has to be a canadian league so, do i relocate to a major city and try to get on a house team, do that for a year and try to get on a travel team? what would having my kid and a full time working husband look like if we lived in a far flung canadian city (Van/Tor/Mtl) and i was traveling to play games. cross that road when i get to it? yep!

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