8.01.2005

"when i was a child i caught a fever"

yonezawa hanabi matsuri
yonezawa no hanabi matsuri des. it rained so hard! yuck!


its been a while.

im really really poor and cannot stop spending money. going somewhere to use the internet. buying ice cream. as of right now i have no money. my credit card pin isnt working. im going to tokyo in a week, and hm. interesting, no? there is always a way through it though. bah. today it ws thirty seven degrees outside. on tuesday i came home and there was a fucking massive praying mantis next to my door. ive never seen a praying mantis. i hear that they dont actually like eating humans. but could be a worthwhile friend. as for the fucking cicada that attacked me. im happy you fell on your back. but not too happy, i mean, i dont want you to gather your posse and come after me. then, really, you'd give me a reason to hate you. fuckers. some jets have left, and new ones came. ive met half of the newbies. cuties. all of them. good times ahead. my dad thought i was moving back to terrace. and im not. so he might not come down and meet me in vancouver anymore. which is sort of a bummer. and ill just have to try and see him at christmas..... im not feeling lonely anymore. even g-mart said that im not so huggy anymore. im not even that excited to keep looking for someone to share my bed on hot mornings. or to eat the rest of the batches of pancakes. (i mean, i wouldnt say "no" if the opportunity arose). my blinding crush didnt work out. and i feel exhausted. ive been distracting myself with horrible horrible books (like "trading up" by candace bushnell. michael patrick king so made sex and the city!). last night we watched love actually. dont slay me amanda, but i fucking love that movie, actually, ive got a horrible addiction to hugh grant that must be stayed! today i had incredible gelato. im so brown right now. yesterday we played tennis in the terrible heat. and ate yaki niku. and drank beer and had a wonderful time. my arms are this beautiful brown, and my face is just dark. i have cut my hair again. and perhaps will save the black dye fiesta until i get to kyoto. this not being pale shit could be addictive. i need to work on art more. that is my new mantra. today i was thinking about that i dont want to be skinny, but that i want to be fit. i want to be really into a sport and something athletic (like yoga or pilates or tennis, hard core, and get really buff for it....) i feel so pathetic saying that though. bizarre. today i noticed i had curves again. not just a big lump. oh yes. fuck, im dehydrated. love.

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