2.12.2007

Girl germs lead to little virus...


today we were talking about anger in my gndr ss class. we were talking about how there's so much fucking shit in the world to fight against all the time and how in the world do we either remove ourselves from that fight or just fucking keep fighting? how do we keep fighting and create change? is it possible? how can we just stand by and watch things like women's studies programs getting cut, fucking picton trial, underfunded transition houses, let alone this fucking media obsession with stick-thin models!!!?? and then trying to battle feminine narcissism and feminist guilt and for fuck sakes! dworkin was right! we're so fucked!! so fucking fucked!!-----(stewart just asked, "are you still having a bath??" so true this is bath time, self care time, time to read homework while submerged in bubblie, dirty-girl, bubble bath. it makes our house smell like lilacs!)-----how are we supposed to fucking reconcile the fact that everytime we have intercourse we fucking lose our identities through the act of fucking and that fucking leave us hollow fucking holes for patriarchy's pleasure! can we even enjoy sex anymore knowing this? (well, i will, but that's not the point). dworkin is right! we're fucked fucked fucked! so, i listened to hole today (You can try to suck me dry/But there's nothing left to suck/Just you try to hold me down/Come on, try to shut me up/Step and fetch, grease my hips/I don't even have to pause) and it was incredible to just rest in the anger and the rage. something i don't often do as a young feminist who is really fucking pissed off with the shit that women have to go through. enough!
on a side note, this evening we watched leningrad cowboys do america and it was really nice to see a movie with comedic details, incredible shots and cinematography, and well, dirty grungy rock and roll. it made me want to watch the commitments. idea for today: themed movie nights that run over a monthly period. ie. dirty rockumentaries, sexploitation, and eighties junk in the trunk. would be so fun. too bad our tv is so small. ordered jane jacob's death of american cities. had a grilled cheese for lunch, grilled cheese for dinner, writing a paper, and i napped today instead of yoga, definitely trading one self care activity for another.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

diandra i loved reading this.
it made me wanna listen to olympia and scream a lots.
is it okay if i mabye.... copy a chunk of it fer my blogaroo? ill credit you of course! hehe

Melissa said...

i could definitely listen to some Hole now. lol