an excerpt from the email to the girls. dont you wish you could have all of it? xoxo di.
"its sooooo good to hear your words. i feel so all over the map right now and out of control. every song i hear, every smell i smell, and every sensation i feel has this effect of making me feel like i will never feel this shit again and that i will never get this back. even though i want to come back to japan one day, i cant figure out if it should be for one week or for the rest of my life. i feel so solid here and so grounded and just the idea of leaving makes my heart break. it is so much to deal with while i am sleep deprived, dealing with a small cold, and a chronic hangover. i feel so out of touch with everyone and i feel horrible that i havent kept in better touch and kept you more updated. i know that you are dealing with your own shit and im fucking awful for not being more interested in what is happening with you. so i guess this will be a long update as to where i am to hopefully get you up to speed and you will see where i am making my choices and why. "
p.s. saying goodbye hurts.
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