last night was rough. my sore throat turned into me waking up at 1am freezing, but hot, and shiverring (how do you spell shivvering?) myself back to sleep. then i was awoken at 3am by being too hot, and taking off my hoodie, and trying to sleep on my blankets, then having to put julie on because my mind was racing in its feverish thoughts. i ended up falling asleep, somehow turning my 7:30am alarm off, and waking up at 10:30am, with those lips that feel weird b/c you are so dehydrated. not cracked, but the insides of your lips feel funny. ive been drinking lots of water and tea to up my fluids. but last night was the first night that i honestly wished i wasnt alone. in that i wish i had a partner in my bed to rub my legs and back to make me warm at 1am, and then at 3am to take off all my clothes to keep me cool. someone that forces water on me, gets me a cool cloth, and just makes me feel like i'm not going mad. that i just have a fever, and that everything will be okay, because they're holding me. i miss that a lot.
ive made my to do list for the day and its pretty spectacular, and its already almost 12pm. egads. so, lesson planning, materials making, and nihongo homework. i can do it. definitely another post later, what else do you do when you're lonely? xoxo.
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